Merry Christmas, Home Skillets

I haven’t really felt like being in the Christmas spirit lately. I guess that’s why it kind of crept up on me, even though last month I had just about everything planned out. When I say everything, I mean everything, like which day I would spend crocheting to when I would go shopping. And do you want to know where that mega organized calendar currently is? It’s in the deepest, darkest depth of my purse. I swear that thing is like Mary Poppins bag and one of these days while I’m digging around in there for spare change I’m going to pull out an area rug and a tall lamp. For my sake, I hope they match each other. But knowing me they’ll be two mismatched Goodwill finds, story of my life.

Technically, it is now Christmas Eve and I’m pretty sure that I have everyone from my gift list crossed off. If I didn’t get you something just think of my witty misfortunes that I post on here for you to read as my gift to you. Like the time that “Chris” shot me in the eye with a Nerf bullet. My eye still twitches from time to time, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I spent the entire day in the kitchen today. Keep your women belong in the kitchen jokes to yourself or the next time you ask for a sandwich it’ll be a knuckle sandwich. I decided for my work peeps I would make cake balls and put them in little individual baggies and pass them out on Christmas day. My thought process was that since these are cake balls it wouldn’t take that long to make them. THEREFORE I SHOULD MAKE 3 BATCHES OF THEM! I. Am. An. Idiot. Baking the actual cakes was pretty quick. It was when I realized that I had to crumble each cake, moosh it all together with some frosting, form little balls, stick them in the freezer for about 2 hours and then cover in chocolate that I thought, hm…this is a bigger project than what I anticipated. Also, mid-way through that thought I realized I had to bake sugar cookies for a co-worker AND THEN I volunteered to bake a second batch of sugar cookie dough for my brother. One day I’ll learn that I already enough stuff going on to say no or just not volunteer.

I’ve been watching Christmas movies to try to get myself in the Christmas spirit and for some reason The Santa Clause is bringing up some old childhood issues. To be honest, I don’t even know what feelings it’s bringing up but I’ve become completely obsessed with this movie. I’m like that annoying kid that the moment a movie ends, I excitedly shout “AGAIN! AGAIN!” And then throw a fit when you’re all, “OH MAH GAWD WE’VE SEEN THIS ABOUT A ZILLION TIMES ALREADY!” In the end, I win because I have those big, blue sad puppy dog eyes (also ignore the fact that I just threatened to punch you in the throat). Plus, I totally have a crush on the head elf, Bernard. WHAT? He’s like 900 years old! There is just something about a guy white a New York accent that just drips with sarcasm that makes me think I could totally bear his sarcastic children. Also, this movie makes me wish I could be an elf.

So, before I go off into a story about me being a North Pole elf (because the South Pole ones are mean) I guess I’ll wrap this post up. I hope that each and one of you are enjoying the time you have with your families. I know that I’ve said this before but I truly thought only three people (because my cat is rude and thinks my blog is LAME) would only read the ramblings of a clutzy spaz. This blog is no means viral but every day when I check for messages and see how many views this little fella has gotten I’m completely surprised. I’m still not ready to reveal the upcoming give away I have planned but thank you. I’m glad that I can provide some kind of mild entertainment for those of you that keep coming back.

Merry Christmas ya filthy animals. 

Please refer to me as Jolly Monkey Buns from now on.